Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Santa Claus Conquers The Martians

So, the whole "movie pack" thing sort of fell by the wayside after a month or so, didn't it? I didn't even manage to write about all the programs I watched! I'm going to try to do better next year. In that spirit, here is a discussion of a movie that fits today better than any other.

SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS is rather infamous as one of those "Worst Movies Ever." So I'm going to go against the grain and say I sort of enjoyed it on its own merits. No, I didn't watch an MST3K version, but rather the original, unexpurgated version as featured on PD video. And yes, I'm feeling fine, thank you.

Understand, the movie is utter nonsense. But I found it to be likeable nonsense. There's nothing remotely realistic about it, and that's fine. After all, it was aimed at young kids. Somewhat tellingly, the only adults who qualify as actual "characters" are either from the North Pole or Mars. The connection to the world of "Grown-Ups" is tenuous at best, filtered through a kid's eyes with regard to both the media and the military. Please note that no EARTH parents ever appear.

SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS has Martians with pop guns, a wholly unterrifying robot, a dude in a bear suit, Milton DeLugg music, and Pia Zadora as a child. The plot has a twist that is telegraphed a mile away if you're paying attention. And then, there's the theme song (embedded below). It will haunt you.

SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS is dumb. But it's a fun dumb. Merry Christmas!

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