So, the whole "movie pack" thing sort of fell by the wayside after a month or so, didn't it? I didn't even manage to write about all the programs I watched! I'm going to try to do better next year. In that spirit, here is a discussion of a movie that fits today better than any other.
SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS is rather infamous as one of those "Worst Movies Ever." So I'm going to go against the grain and say I sort of enjoyed it on its own merits. No, I didn't watch an MST3K version, but rather the original, unexpurgated version as featured on PD video. And yes, I'm feeling fine, thank you.
Understand, the movie is utter nonsense. But I found it to be likeable nonsense. There's nothing remotely realistic about it, and that's fine. After all, it was aimed at young kids. Somewhat tellingly, the only adults who qualify as actual "characters" are either from the North Pole or Mars. The connection to the world of "Grown-Ups" is tenuous at best, filtered through a kid's eyes with regard to both the media and the military. Please note that no EARTH parents ever appear.
SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS has Martians with pop guns, a wholly unterrifying robot, a dude in a bear suit, Milton DeLugg music, and Pia Zadora as a child. The plot has a twist that is telegraphed a mile away if you're paying attention. And then, there's the theme song (embedded below). It will haunt you.
SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS is dumb. But it's a fun dumb. Merry Christmas!
Showing posts with label movie packs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movie packs. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
Monday, June 10, 2013
Invisible Avenger
INVISIBLE AVENGER (1958) is a bit of an odd duck. Apparently intended as a TV pilot, it didn't sell, and instead got a theatrical release (or two). I've seen ads that I assume are for it being issued under this title, but the film itself runs under an hour. I guess it was used to fill out the bottom half of a double bill.
What makes this particularly unusual is that INVISIBLE AVENGER is a largely-unheralded film adapting the Shadow. It's apparently the second busted pilot for that noted crimefighter. I actually have no trouble understanding why this iteration didn't go on to become a series. It has a number of weaknesses that undermine its good qualities.
The setting is New Orleans, and it appears the film was really filmed there (especially given the appearance of TV station WDSU). It definitely has a feel for the local color, but this brings up one of the things about this project that puzzles me. The Shadow is a visitor to the city. So, would the Shadow series have relied on location filming across the country? And if not, why shoot the pilot so far off the beaten path?
More of an issue is the unusual set-up. Lamont Cranston is still the Shadow, but he forgoes any sort of recognizable outfit like the slouch hat or the cloak. His identity is ostensibly secret, but he sure goes around turning invisible willy-nilly without a care in the world. And then, there is his mentor. No Margo Lane for this Shadow; he's saddled with a sort of mystic who apparently taught him the secrets of the Shadow. I'm not one who finds subtext in each and every work of fiction, but holy moley, this pretty much screams out "gay couple" whenever they are on-screen together. It's almost like the people responsible sensed this and overcompensated by having Cranston declare his interest in every woman in the cast.
The plot confuses me. I can't say I wasn't (mildly) entertained, but there are parts that just don't make any sense. Like, televising an execution? Really? This is not anything that was going to happen. And even for something that runs under an hour, characters disappear abruptly and the plot shifts gears abruptly. It feels like either some sort of tinkering occurred, or the script just wasn't especially coherent in the first place.
I'm also a bit flabbergasted to see what amounts to product placement in the late 1950s. Besides the appearance of WDSU, both Delta Airlines and Avis are prominently featured. Actually, there's damn near an Avis commercial close to the end, considering how long the camera lingers on their logo. What's weird is that Avis is not exactly depicted in a positive light. Cannot imagine how this would have helped them.
I don't know - INVISIBLE AVENGER is sort of OK the first time, but it's not something I am eager to revisit. However, it appears that at least one other company saw potential in it. The only trailer for it that I have found is this re-release version entitled BOURBON STREET SHADOWS. It includes salacious footage that is nowhere in evidence during INVISIBLE AVENGER. Was it included only in the trailer, or is BOURBON STREET SHADOWS a spicier re-edit? We'll probably never know!
What makes this particularly unusual is that INVISIBLE AVENGER is a largely-unheralded film adapting the Shadow. It's apparently the second busted pilot for that noted crimefighter. I actually have no trouble understanding why this iteration didn't go on to become a series. It has a number of weaknesses that undermine its good qualities.
The setting is New Orleans, and it appears the film was really filmed there (especially given the appearance of TV station WDSU). It definitely has a feel for the local color, but this brings up one of the things about this project that puzzles me. The Shadow is a visitor to the city. So, would the Shadow series have relied on location filming across the country? And if not, why shoot the pilot so far off the beaten path?
More of an issue is the unusual set-up. Lamont Cranston is still the Shadow, but he forgoes any sort of recognizable outfit like the slouch hat or the cloak. His identity is ostensibly secret, but he sure goes around turning invisible willy-nilly without a care in the world. And then, there is his mentor. No Margo Lane for this Shadow; he's saddled with a sort of mystic who apparently taught him the secrets of the Shadow. I'm not one who finds subtext in each and every work of fiction, but holy moley, this pretty much screams out "gay couple" whenever they are on-screen together. It's almost like the people responsible sensed this and overcompensated by having Cranston declare his interest in every woman in the cast.
The plot confuses me. I can't say I wasn't (mildly) entertained, but there are parts that just don't make any sense. Like, televising an execution? Really? This is not anything that was going to happen. And even for something that runs under an hour, characters disappear abruptly and the plot shifts gears abruptly. It feels like either some sort of tinkering occurred, or the script just wasn't especially coherent in the first place.
I'm also a bit flabbergasted to see what amounts to product placement in the late 1950s. Besides the appearance of WDSU, both Delta Airlines and Avis are prominently featured. Actually, there's damn near an Avis commercial close to the end, considering how long the camera lingers on their logo. What's weird is that Avis is not exactly depicted in a positive light. Cannot imagine how this would have helped them.
I don't know - INVISIBLE AVENGER is sort of OK the first time, but it's not something I am eager to revisit. However, it appears that at least one other company saw potential in it. The only trailer for it that I have found is this re-release version entitled BOURBON STREET SHADOWS. It includes salacious footage that is nowhere in evidence during INVISIBLE AVENGER. Was it included only in the trailer, or is BOURBON STREET SHADOWS a spicier re-edit? We'll probably never know!
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Invaders From Space
This is a tiny bit of a cheat. You see, I've owned INVADERS FROM SPACE on both VHS and DVD for yeeeeeears. I've even seen one half (I'll explain) of the Japanese version. Still, it came in one of my packs, so I took the opportunity to revisit it.
I'd like to officially go on record here as saying I freakin' love the Starman film series! They are not only action-packed, but quite stylish and occasionally creepy. They're also absurd as all get out, but that's part of their inherent charm. You're not really watching anything close to reality when you watch a Starman movie.
They're also a trifle incoherent, but this is not entirely the fault of the original material. The Japanese films were shorter featurettes edited together for American consumption. INVADERS FROM SPACE takes two separate but connected movies and joins them into a whole. It also loses a little subtext in converting Kappa Seijin into Salamander Men, and honestly, it sounds like the dubbing script was just made up on the fly without any thought to internal consistency.
No matter. INVADERS FROM SPACE is a rollicking good time. I enjoyed myself so much that I had to take a screenshot of this moment near the end of Starman about to kick some Salamander Man ass.
I'd like to officially go on record here as saying I freakin' love the Starman film series! They are not only action-packed, but quite stylish and occasionally creepy. They're also absurd as all get out, but that's part of their inherent charm. You're not really watching anything close to reality when you watch a Starman movie.
They're also a trifle incoherent, but this is not entirely the fault of the original material. The Japanese films were shorter featurettes edited together for American consumption. INVADERS FROM SPACE takes two separate but connected movies and joins them into a whole. It also loses a little subtext in converting Kappa Seijin into Salamander Men, and honestly, it sounds like the dubbing script was just made up on the fly without any thought to internal consistency.
No matter. INVADERS FROM SPACE is a rollicking good time. I enjoyed myself so much that I had to take a screenshot of this moment near the end of Starman about to kick some Salamander Man ass.
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
The Incredible Petrified World
I once said to pal David McRobie "Life is too short to be watching Jerry Warren movies." So why did I watch THE INCREDIBLE PETRIFIED WORLD, produced and directed by Jerry Warren? I dunno - because it was there? I think it somehow manages to be the only Warren film in all the movie sets I've recently purchased. It has been a few years since I endured the twin wonders of THE WILD WORLD OF BATWOMAN and FRANKENSTEIN ISLAND, so I was feeling charitable.
Ooof. How did Jerry Warren ever convince anyone to give him money to make even one movie, much less almost a dozen? That was what I said on Twitter after starting this sucker. I waved the white flag later in the day, but then girded my loins and somehow finished the movie.
The amazing thing about this movie is that it is a big pile of nothing. If it was any more nothing, it might cease to exist entirely. Pretty dull stuff all the way around, and a waste of some interesting performers. It's not even as good as this trailer.
Ooof. How did Jerry Warren ever convince anyone to give him money to make even one movie, much less almost a dozen? That was what I said on Twitter after starting this sucker. I waved the white flag later in the day, but then girded my loins and somehow finished the movie.
The amazing thing about this movie is that it is a big pile of nothing. If it was any more nothing, it might cease to exist entirely. Pretty dull stuff all the way around, and a waste of some interesting performers. It's not even as good as this trailer.
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Mission Stardust
The first film I watched in my movie pack madness was MISSION STARDUST (1967). This was not the original plan. I'd initially chosen the Matt Cimber-directed warrior woman film HUNDRA to kick off this little project of mine. But when I found that disc and loaded it up, I impulsively decided to scratch my long standing itch to see MISSION STARDUST.
MISSION STARDUST is based on the "Perry Rhodan" novels, and apparently has a bad reputation among the fans of the source material. While I've read some Rhodan, I can't call myself an expert. So having said that, this movie is a lot of fun. I'm not sure it deserves all the scorn I've seen heaped on it.
Don't get me wrong - MISSION STARDUST is not a classic that will change your life. But it is an engaging and likeable little epic, even though nothing really happens for the longest time. It is also achingly 1960s, in a way that could only come from that era. This alone might be sufficient enticement (or warning) for some of you.
Let it also be known for the record that this film features an actress named Essy Persson as the character Thora. Thora has become my latest fictional character crush. That's both for her personality (which I cannot show you here) and her looks (which I can).
MISSION STARDUST is based on the "Perry Rhodan" novels, and apparently has a bad reputation among the fans of the source material. While I've read some Rhodan, I can't call myself an expert. So having said that, this movie is a lot of fun. I'm not sure it deserves all the scorn I've seen heaped on it.
Don't get me wrong - MISSION STARDUST is not a classic that will change your life. But it is an engaging and likeable little epic, even though nothing really happens for the longest time. It is also achingly 1960s, in a way that could only come from that era. This alone might be sufficient enticement (or warning) for some of you.
Let it also be known for the record that this film features an actress named Essy Persson as the character Thora. Thora has become my latest fictional character crush. That's both for her personality (which I cannot show you here) and her looks (which I can).
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Movie (Pack) Madness
A funny thing happened during my absence from blogging. I wound up buying over 100 movies in one day. This might sound like an incredible extravagance on my part, and a mite difficult to boot. But no, all it involved was stopping at Wal-Mart to pick up anti-freeze.
As I wandered the aisles of what I term Necessary Evil, I found a display dump with a number of those Mill Creek multi-movie packs. I've long considered buying them, but could never justify it. But could I justify $8.99 apiece? Wha--?!? Yep, that's how much these were. So I grabbed a few, and just picked up a couple more today.
I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, this is a fantastic opportunity for me to watch and own many movies that I would otherwise never have seen. On the other hand, these multi-packs are one of the things that I think has seriously devalued movies in general. If you do the math, 50 movies at $8.99 comes out to something like 18¢ a movie. Or if you figure out how much you are paying "per episode" on the 150 EPISODE CLASSIC SCI-FI TV, it comes to less than a penny per program.
I realize I'm flashing my Old Man Card here, but I can remember a time when I happily paid $8.99 for one LP speed VHS tape of a movie of questionable worth. How long did that Goodtimes Home Video edition of HORROR EXPRESS stay in print? There were a plethora of others, but that one stands out in my memory. Who could have foreseen a day when even being able to buy cheap tapes of bad old movies would pale next to the ability to buy bad old movies in bulk for practically nothing?
Still, my reservations don't change the fact that these collections exist. And since they do, I might as well use them for my own devious purposes. I have already watched a few films that had intrigued me over the years, but which I was probably not going to otherwise buy. Yeah, I've now seen things like MISSION STARDUST, INVISIBLE AVENGER and SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS. And the funny thing is that one of my main worries about these discs - that the image would be all blocky - has not not been an issue. I guess/hope that is something that's been cleaned up a bit in more recent years.
I've added a "movie packs" tag here, to denote films I've watched specifically because they were included in these multi-packs. I don't want to overburden the "general nonsense" tag too much, even though it's not entirely useful for finding anything. This way, you can rest assured you able to seek out all the entries in my strange odyssey in movie watching.
As I wandered the aisles of what I term Necessary Evil, I found a display dump with a number of those Mill Creek multi-movie packs. I've long considered buying them, but could never justify it. But could I justify $8.99 apiece? Wha--?!? Yep, that's how much these were. So I grabbed a few, and just picked up a couple more today.
I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, this is a fantastic opportunity for me to watch and own many movies that I would otherwise never have seen. On the other hand, these multi-packs are one of the things that I think has seriously devalued movies in general. If you do the math, 50 movies at $8.99 comes out to something like 18¢ a movie. Or if you figure out how much you are paying "per episode" on the 150 EPISODE CLASSIC SCI-FI TV, it comes to less than a penny per program.
I realize I'm flashing my Old Man Card here, but I can remember a time when I happily paid $8.99 for one LP speed VHS tape of a movie of questionable worth. How long did that Goodtimes Home Video edition of HORROR EXPRESS stay in print? There were a plethora of others, but that one stands out in my memory. Who could have foreseen a day when even being able to buy cheap tapes of bad old movies would pale next to the ability to buy bad old movies in bulk for practically nothing?
Still, my reservations don't change the fact that these collections exist. And since they do, I might as well use them for my own devious purposes. I have already watched a few films that had intrigued me over the years, but which I was probably not going to otherwise buy. Yeah, I've now seen things like MISSION STARDUST, INVISIBLE AVENGER and SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS. And the funny thing is that one of my main worries about these discs - that the image would be all blocky - has not not been an issue. I guess/hope that is something that's been cleaned up a bit in more recent years.
I've added a "movie packs" tag here, to denote films I've watched specifically because they were included in these multi-packs. I don't want to overburden the "general nonsense" tag too much, even though it's not entirely useful for finding anything. This way, you can rest assured you able to seek out all the entries in my strange odyssey in movie watching.
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