Saturday, January 1, 2011

2010 Was Lotsa Laffs Too

* I have never had the courage to wear a shiny shirt with an open collar coupled with a shark tooth pendant. I met a man this year who has no such hang-up.

* I watched Richard Roundtree fight a forklift...and WIN!

* I learned that no one can deny the pink sombrero, especially when it is accompanied by an adorable child.

* While watching IRON MAN special features, I asked: Has anyone thought to redub some of the Iron Monger scenes with dialogue from THE BIG LEBOWSKI? Because Iron Dude would rule.

* I guaranteed that there was no ruler short enough to measure how little I care about Megan Fox, TRANSFORMERS 3, or whether the twain shall meet.

* When you tell people to fear your Star Wars disco CD, they do.

* I revealed that I know the Muffin Man. He gives me cookies. I don't get it.

* I got a captcha that read "Paffenbarger strap." That still sounds...filthy.

* I decided every movie would be improved immeasurably if the climax involved Kamen Rider Diend summoning Kamen Rider J.

* I replaced the chant in the Bay City Rollers' "Saturday Night" with "H-A-T-E-R-A-D-E! Punch!"

* I had a dream about riding shotgun when someone abandoned Alan Moore at a gas station.

* I was startled to find that I was tired of hearing about sex tapes.

* I partied like it was 1999 - in other words, with Martin Landau & Barbara Bain.

FAVORITE OUT-OF-CONTEXT QUOTE, SECOND RUNNER-UP

"Accessories not for use with smaller Shogun Warriors."

FAVORITE OUT-OF-CONTEXT QUOTE, FIRST RUNNER-UP

"Fits any hamster."

FAVORITE OUT-OF-CONTEXT QUOTE, GRAND PRIZE

"Gonads are useful for their purpose, but they are no substitute for brains."--Paul Harvey. Good day!

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